August 15, 2011

This past weekend we went to Colorado to celebrate Papa Talley’s 50^th birthday. I can’t even begin to tell you how many times we were harassed for not having a baby yet. 

Even several of the younger Talley family members harassed us for not having a baby. 

I even told Papa Talley that I couldn’t wait for him to be my child’s grandparent…and started to stand up in front of the whole family as if I was going to announce a pregnancy.

I did it completely in spite of everyone. The timing was perfect - of course I wasn't going to wave goodbye to that opportunity. It was a joke, but Mama Talley didn’t think it was funny. She told us very matter-of-factly that she would throw a party if we were to have a baby.

So...that's how the in-laws feel about us bringing a child into the world.

My parents, on the other hand, have told me plenty of times that they are just fine waiting to become grandparents. For some reason having the title as a grandparent automatically makes them older.

My mom also thinks that I will tell her the moment I find out I'm pregnant. 

Well....sorry, mom and dad.

Yup, that’s right. Clayton and I are going to start trying to have a baby as soon as I run out of my birth control pills, which will be in a little over a month.

The best part about all of this is that everyone thinks we are waiting to have a baby until I graduate, which will be in six school semesters if everything goes according to plan. That was the original plan, actually. I wasn’t sure if I was going to be able to have a baby while attending school and working, and I didn’t want to drop out of school. I didn't know how I could do it.

BUT....Clayton and I really, really, REALLY want to have a baby. So, we've prayed about it numerous times, and got the wonderful yet terrifying answer that our time has come.

It feels so right but I can't help feel a bit incredulous about it. The thought of ME being a mother to someone is hard to get a handle on! I still go to my own mother with questions way more than I ever have before in my life -- how in the world will I be able to be the mother of my own child? What if I don't know the answer to their questions? What if I don't know what to say? What if I don't know how to comfort them?

Scary thoughts, indeed.

I still don't know how we will be able to afford it. Hopefully by the time the baby is born we will be worrying about a mortgage payment. I am planning on working throughout the entirety of my pregnancy up until the baby is born, and Clayton is planning on working full-time and taking classes. So far, things are looking kind of up.

We finally, FINALLY had an offer accepted for a beautiful home located in Eagle Mountain, UT. If we can get this house, our monthly payments will be a little cheaper than the rent amount we are paying now. We will be spending way more for gas money though. Unfortunately, Eagle Mountain is about 40 mins away from Provo. 

Since I'll hopefully get pregnant in September/October, I will be taking classes. I'm so close to finishing my generals that my class options are narrowing way down. One prerequisite class I had to take this semester had only one spot available during an 8:00am class. Yikes. That meant I would have to wake up pretty dang early in order to drive from Eagle Mountain to Lehi, and then take the bus from Lehi to Provo, which is about an hour and a half commute. PLUS - I can only imagine how pleasant the morning sickness would be at that early in the morning, since my body has already showed signs that it does not like to be "pregnant". 

THANKFULLY, with daily checking, I was able to rearrange my school schedule to afternoon and evening classes. Then if I am too sick in the morning, I won't have to miss class. :)

Clayton had an interview this morning for a job that would significantly help us out. If he got it, we would be making more money than we are now. Plus, it's at a school, so Clayton would be able to get his foot in the door at an education facility. 

I'm still not sure how I will be able to attend school and work once the baby is born. I have no idea what to do. I'm entirely opposed to day care, and I don't want to have someone baby-sit everyday. Hmmm. I'm sure God will provide a way for us.

Yes, my education might be put on hold for a little bit. Yes, we won't have nearly as much money as we are used to having. Yes, we won't have the luxury of sleep anymore. Yes, we won't have much free time anymore. But I know we will be so incredibly blessed with this child when it enters ours lives.